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Modern Malay engagement ceremony

Hello, happy Tuesday. On Sunday I went to my hubby's cousin's engagement ceremony. The cousin is male so I joined the proposing group (rombongan meminang) with hubby's family. And I also decided to flex my photographer muscle that day. It's practice time.

Anyway for the man who is proposing he will bring presents (hantaran) for the girl of his dreams. There will be aunties and cousins holding the presents in its trays.


The group making their way to the girl's house.


The girl's house is situated next to rubber trees. My Mom In Law's house also has a backyard land of rubber tree, but no one seems to tap the rubber anymore.



The group is welcomed by the girl's family.


The man in red is the guy's spokesperson while the girl's spokeperson is in yellow.
The spokespersons are usually elder males in the family. In this situation the boy's spokesperson is his maternal granduncle.

With carefully chosen words he asked for the hand of the intended girl and the girl's spokesperson asked some questions just to break the ice. The girl's side accepted the proposal, so they discussed on how long will the engagement be and the amount of wang hantaran. Then they take a look at the ring and call for the girl to wear the ring. Oh, the guy is not present in the room during the ceremony, but he is sitting outside waiting should he be called in.

My hubby's cousin is 25 and his fiancee 20, so young. But since marriage is recommended by God should the situation be right, who are we to argue. They'll be engaged for a year and the wedding will hopefully happen during that time, InshaAllah.

It's time to put a ring on her. The boy's mom (hubby's auntie) puts the ring on her to-be-daughter in law finger ring and a relationship is built.


Girls nowadays wear bride like attire. Some people even have dais.
Some even hire photographers and have photobooks. Some even take outdoor photos



Engagement ceremony is on its way to commercialization like weddings.

And then relatives called the guy and have the newly engaged couple photo, taken.
I forced the two to look at each other's eyes. As usual they laugh bashfully, the girl's family mentioned that they were not that bashful during normal times. LOL

After that of course we eat. Oh the girl's house was also holding a wedding party that day, so there was a pelamin/dais. but they didn't use it.

Now, let's take a look at the hantaran or presents.
The girl will give presents in an uneven number and two extra presents from the guy.
Let's say the girl is giving 7, so the guy will give 5 presents.
If the girl is giving 13, the guy will give 11 presents.
It all depends on the guy and girl. They could just bring the ring and tepak sirih.


The ones in blue circle are from the guy and the ones in pink are the girls.
From the guy are - sirih junjung (which I made), towel with Happy Engagement embroidered on it, a bodycare hamper, a cake and something else which I don't know.
The girl gave, towel, bodycare hamper, towel, cake and sweets.


And I made this floral engagement which is supposed to be a sirih junjung, but looked more like a floral thingy. Can you see the gambir, kapur and whatnots amongst the flowers? There weren't that many sirih leaves.

Ok, that's all for now.

Me and Mikael had fun at looking up close a rubber tree.
We usually see rubber trees along the PLUS highway.
A rare sight for city people like me.

Tammat

2 comments:

Au and Target said...

I hope your cousin is happy, and wish him a long and happy marriage.

Hey, how's your son? Pictures please!

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